Eat Out To Help Out Or Eat Out To Cat-Call: Being A Waitress Post Lockdown
We all love a bargain. I cannot tell you how much money I’ve spent purely because items were on sale – clothes, books, make-up. You name it, I’ve bought it. So when Rishi Sunak said he’d fund half of our dinner bill throughout August it’s no wonder we all jumped at the opportunity.
The Eat Out to Help Out scheme has been a lifeline for small businesses such as the café I work at in Northamptonshire. 50% off food for customers and a boost in business for the restaurants. A win-win right?
If you’ve been living under a rock, let me catch you up. The Eat Out to Help Out scheme allowed customers to claim 50% off their bill (with a maximum of £10 per person) simply by eating in the restaurant on a Monday, Tuesday or Wednesday throughout August. The discount was then reimbursed to the restaurant by the government. You could also utilise this offer as many times as you liked, meaning you could eat out for breakfast, lunch and dinner if you really wanted to. Some larger chain restaurants decided to extend the scheme throughout September and possibly October out of their own back pocket.
From waitressing over the Covid-19 summer, let me tell you -- this scheme definitely worked.
We were busier than ever both with our returning regulars and some newbies all looking to take advantage of the unprecedented [because we all love that word now] discount. I’ve never cut more slices of cake in my life. I’ve also never gone through so much bubble bath because my little legs needed it by the end of the day. And although it’s been busy, it’s been really lovely seeing everyone reunite with friends and family, hearing laughter that isn’t buffering over a zoom call and being able to eat Lemon Meringue Pie for lunch was pretty good too. With our regular customers being of the Werther’s Original generation it’s lovely to hear people say they feel safe and happy in our little courtyard setting. And as staff we’ve loved being back too, despite the increased workload.
One thing that also increased over August, apart from customers and the layers of hand sanitizer on my hands, was the amount of catcalling myself and fellow waitresses faced.
Catcalling can be defined as ‘unwanted comments or gestures often of a sexualised nature’. We see this type of behaviour depicted in popular culture all the time. Let me set the scene -- often a woman, wearing a short skirt or a low cut top, is wolf-whistled at from a fairly attractive looking builder high on a scaffolding. She’s flattered, smiles and moves on with her day. But in the real world, catcalling isn’t like this. As a waitress, dressed appropriately for a day of carrying heavy plates of Full English breakfasts and trays of coffee (not that what I’m wearing should even matter), catcalling for me can occur simply by doing my job, taking an order and sharing a smile. And unlike the woman on the TV, I’m not flattered but I continue to smile – my customer service training displaying itself in full force.
And I think that our current situation has created the opportunities for this behaviour.
To reduce risk, as part and parcel of life in the post-lockdown world, customers are now required to fill out a track and trace form. In some larger businesses this is done via a QR code which also loads your menu and reduces contact between you and service staff. For our little café, where a Nokia 3310 is more prevalent than an iPhone, this just wouldn’t be practical. For me, that means when I take an order, I hand over a paper track and trace form for the customer to complete. Easy enough and this ensures that everyone is tracked and traced.
Reactions to track and trace have been… mixed.
For the most part, our customers have been fairly willing or unconcerned by filling this in. Others have been grateful we’re taking their and our health seriously. A few didn’t even know track and trace was a thing.
There is, however, another group. The kind of customer that brings out my false smile and the quiet discreet whispers with other staff members. The kind of customer that when handed a track and trace form thinks the appropriate response is “You’ve got my number now love” *Wink*.
Maybe these comments – which are a form of catcalling – are the result of our loss of social skills due to lockdown. But these comments come from older males who have invaded our quaint little café over summer to take advantage of ‘Rishi’s dishes’. So maybe it’s a generational thing, maybe the older man thinks its fine to make these comments towards a much younger woman due to the attitudes towards women which they grew up immersed in. Maybe my position as a waitress makes them think comments such as “Is this you flirting with me?” are okay.
But then -- maybe I’m giving them excuses.
And to be completely honest, none of these men would make me swipe right.
In a year when we’ve challenged our outdated attitudes towards race, spoken louder than ever about the climate change emergency and are facing a global pandemic -- surely it’s time for us all to acknowledge that catcalling isn’t okay. Perhaps we need to start calling out this kind of behaviour. When both of these incidents happened, I was visibly uncomfortable, but no-one batted an eyelid. Nobody said a thing, in fact some laughed along.
And I’m guilty of that too; I laughed these incidents off – although mine was more awkward laughter rather than a genuine laugh. I’m not sure what these men are expecting. A text from me later on? A wink back? Did they expect me to run away and marry them? Of course not - that would be absurd. Almost as absurd as making the comment in the first place.
Rishi’s Dishes may be over but until I start my career in writing (ps. please hire me), my days of enduring catcalling are not. In fact, only the other day 2 men placed a bet on my shoe size. The £1 they passed across the table could have been my tip -- just saying. At least they’ve given me something to talk about to friends and family.
So it’s time to start the conversation, because although these are funny anecdotes which I am able to brush off, catcalling shouldn’t be taken lightly or ignored for the sake of maintaining good customer service. It’s the responsibility of all of us to point out when something’s been said that simply is not okay.
Written by Lily Smith
Hi I’m Lily, and if I’m not writing, you’ll find me hunched over my laptop watching the one of the endless Netflix dramas, reading the latest Liane Moriarty novel or drinking dubious amounts of Vodka and Fanta Twist at the weekends while belting my heart out to Lewis Capaldi. You can find me on twitter @Lily_Smith55 or browse at my portfolio https://lilyjsmith55.wixsite.com/lilysmithwriter where you’ll find all my ramblings on all things feminism and women’s lifestyle.