A One Way Ticket to South America
A few years ago, around my 25th birthday, I was in a really good position, I had accomplished most of the stuff I was aiming for but something was missing. I was failing on living.
I had moved to a different country and I was learning a lot, I was doing really well at my job but also I was so stressed out that I wasn't enjoying it.
Around that time I met who is now my partner, and he was the opposite. He told me stories about all his travels and experiences, and I found myself feeling jealous.
So here is when my quarter-life crisis started. Obviously, everyone kept telling me I was young and all that, but my problem wasn´t about getting old, it was about the way I was spending that time.
So I started to think about what I wanted to do with my life: “Did I want to keep this path? Working all the time, and worrying or complaining about work even when I wasn't there?”
I started to read stories about travel, watching movies. I knew I wanted to experience that also.
So I packed my backpack, convinced my mum I was going to be really careful and then bought a one-way ticket to South America.
Throughout this journey, I lived a lot more experiences that I was expecting to. I learnt the true meaning of sharing thanks to the people I met, who even opened their houses without knowing us, just so we didn’t have to spend the night on the street. I lived in pure nature; I climbed the Fitz Roy Mountain in the dark so I could see the most beautiful sunrise I have ever seen. I lived on the beach for days at a time, where the most important thing was to find water. But there was one moment when I realized what was all about.
We had been traveling for about a month and a half, when we arrived at El Bolson; a little city in the South of Argentina.
One day we were sitting in the park, in the middle of the village when something amazing happened.
I realized I was happy. I wasn't doing anything, I was just sitting there, looking at the world around me and tears of happiness fell upon my cheeks.
This feeling made me think “how could I be so happy if I wasn't doing anything, I wasn't accomplishing anything, I wasn't making any money, or doing anything great?”.
But there I was, happy.
So “What was happiness all about?” Then another answer came to me, I have always had a plan for me, I wanted to have a really good job, be someone important and have a lot of money.
But the question I should have been asking was this - “will all of this make me happy?” and then I thought why I wanted to do all this, and there were two reasons. First, I always wanted to have money so I could have everything I wanted. The second and most important reason was that I wanted to make my mum and brother proud of me. I wanted them to be able to count on me the same way I had counted on them all my life. I wanted to be able to retire my mum and give her a big house on the beach.
After this, came something even scarier, it came the fear. The fear of failing those who you love. I had changed and I wanted to change my life plan, but would they understand?
It was Jose; my partner; who assured me that my mum and brother, the people who I wanted to please so much, would be happier with a large smile on my face rather than with a large house in the beach
I obviously knew it was true. They had never asked anything from me, on the contrary, they had always thought of my happiness and well being over everything else.
But I had carried this dream with me for such a long time that it felt almost impossible to change paths at that moment.
The trip ended after almost five months, and after a lot of thoughts about what I really wanted to do with my life, I decided I wanted to write. I love reading, and I started to write when I was really young, but somehow this part of me had fallen from my life. Now I was ready to rediscover it.
So I went back home after the trip, and I was at my mum's one day talking, I can't remember what we were talking about, and she asked what I was going to do next.
It took all my courage to tell her I wanted to throw all my years of studying, plus all the money she had paid for it into the bin, and what I really wish to do was writing.
Her answer simply was: Then write, if that is what you want to do, just do it.
I had never felt so relieved in my life. My mum, the person who I wanted to do all that for, wasn't even thinking about all the other stuff I was worried about, she just wanted me to do whatever made me happy.
Since then, I spent a lot of time trying to discover who I am; not what I do but who I am and who I want to be.
Most importantly, I try to enjoy every day. I try not to stress so much about the future and live in the present. There is actually something really exciting about the unknown.
The biggest thing I learnt from my travels? We spend our lives looking for answers, but, most of the time, it’s when we are not asking the question that we are finally able to hear them.
Written by Elvira Romero
I am Elvira, from Seville, Spain, but I live in London. I work as a waitress in a restaurant. I have always worked in hospitality but now I have found my passion for writing. I started a blog a year ago relatosdeunamenteinquieta.com. I would love to write my own books someday.