A Return to ‘The New Normal’
It’s been two months of lockdown. I have never in 26 years of life gone through a crisis that mirrors this pandemic. I am still not sure I understand what is going on, two months in. A lot of things that I once took for granted, now seem obsolete.
Right before the lockdown was instated in the UK, I decided to go home to Romania. The home country I hadn’t lived in for almost 7 years at the time. I left to study in the UK and stayed for work, which is a story commonly heard from people of my generation. On a normal day, in a normal month, it would not be easy to take the decision to go back home for an unknown period of time, with uncertainty looming over everything, but here I was stepping on a plane, mask and gloves in tow, hoping and praying I was never in contact with anyone who might have been infected and that coronavirus was not something I brought home.
Getting used to being back in the house was a long process. I can’t lie and say everything was just like six and a half years ago when I left, and it was all going to be alright, because these are people I have known all my life. A mum is a mum and a dad is a dad. They were, of course, concerned and wanted me to be a bit less independent and let them do stuff for me that I normally would do by myself. They love cooking for me, making me my favourite dessert and getting me stuff they know I like, and that’s super nice, but I was so not used to that. I found it incredibly hard to deal with it, and that affected my mental health quite a bit at the beginning.
On top of getting used to being at home with my parents and brother, there was also working from home to get used to. There were a host of uncertainties coming from the governments of both countries, and from my employer. Nobody knew which direction or stance to take. It was a difficult transition, heightened by my anxiety, and by the need to feel ‘normal’ again. But what was normal in this age?
Everywhere I looked there were incredibly productive people, who seemed to have everything going on for them, and here I was struggling with the most basic tasks, with the most basic issues of getting used to living back at home, with the privilege of my parents helping with everything if only I let them. The first few weeks were the absolute toughest. I had to get used to a new routine and a new working space. My desk is in my bedroom, so switching off was incredibly difficult, and I simply could not sleep properly, no matter what I did. On top of that, my anxiety was heightened by the uncertainty across everything. It was something I normally keep under control quite easily, but now it was all over the place, and nothing seemed to be going well. About five weeks in, I realised that, hey, this routine I had been perfecting over time was starting to pay off. I was sleeping better and my anxiety was more or less kept ‘at bay’. I was a bit happier, and had started doing other stuff, rather than just surviving, and it was going well.
Then restrictions started to be lifted. First in a few countries, then in more countries, and then in the UK. I could feel the panic rising in my throat. I could feel the dread to return to what we had before morphing into a big monster in front of me. I knew that I did not want to return to whatever normal we had before, because I realised that it was not necessarily healthy. The ’always on’, hyper productive culture we had nurtured as a society was not a great achievement of our generation. It was and still is damaging. The routine from beforehand, where I was proud of myself for achieving who knows how many things in a day, was what made coming home and having a different routine so difficult, what disturbed my sleep and kept me awake at night, what stopped me from switching off.
I recently saw a tweet from Matt Haig, author of ‘The Midnight Library’, which said: “Yes, lockdown poses its own mental health challenges. But can we please stop pretending our former world of long working hours, stressful commutes, hectic crowds, shopping centres, infinite choice, mass consumerism, air pollution and 24/7 everything was a mental health utopia.” I could not agree more. What we are going through now is not a mental health utopia by any means, but having time to focus on things that ‘feed your soul’ makes a huge difference. By not being married to work, by listening to others intently, and by simply being on this planet. The idea of potentially returning to the office absolutely terrifies me, because I am scared of returning to the pre-pandemic normal that didn’t seem to be doing many people any good.
I, like many people, come from a privileged position, where I have the ability to ‘choose’ what I can come back to and what I can’t come back to. But what happens to those of us who can’t do that? What happens to those who have no choice? How can we, in this society, nurture this new culture?
There are a lot of questions I ask myself on the brink of this imminent return to work. A big part of my job requires me to be in the office, at least for a few hours a day. I am wondering how comfortable I truly am with that. Employers and employees around the world have been placed in a position where, at points, they have to choose between their health and going into the office. Balancing out which one seems more worth it, because they have a family to feed, or some debt to pay, and cannot afford to lose their job. The digital world is an enabler in this pandemic, but there are a lot of places where it can push the boundaries to ensure more people, including the ones on the front lines, are protected.
There are a lot of things this pandemic can teach us, if only we are willing to listen. The way many companies have adapted and became agile. The way employers invested in their people to ensure they feel cared for, especially if the nature of their job meant they were at risk. Friends and family came to the rescue for help care for loved ones. In times of crisis the world can become a better place. So many of us have shown that, and have seen it. It can also become a far worse place to live in, which I am sure is true for many. Working in the fashion industry, the latter sentence seems to be increasingly true, especially for garment workers in developing countries who are being left without any income because of companies cancelling their collections. It will always be a happy and sad world we live in, and we can’t have it all the way we want, but I hope a big learning from this pandemic is how to be kinder and more compassionate to each other.
For myself, and many others, returning to work is a scary thing, maybe scarier than we would like to admit. Getting into a routine helps settle a lot of pressures that were emphasised by uncertainty. The dismissal of that routine automatically intensifies the feeling of uncertainty, and that often affects you in ways you cannot describe. This paralysing feeling of fear is natural, because we do not know what to expect. We do not know what ‘normal’ we are returning to: what it means to be in an office environment again, how it feels to be in the same building as other people you don’t know well, and what ‘normal’ actually means.
Employers’ communication around issues and concerns is paramount for a good return. Having an open conversation where the employer and employee are truly on the same page is very important to quash those anxious and fearful feelings, and instead create a basis of balance and open communication that is rarely found in an employer-employee relationship. Having new processes, and time frames, set in place for a smooth return to the office is something that eases the burden of panic on our mental health. After all, it is what keeps us in check with our routines and what helps us incorporate this new normal into our day to day life.
What we are experiencing now is not something we have gone through before. There is always a certain level of uncertainty, because naturally we can’t control everything, but the way these next few weeks are handled will set the tone for the future of the workplace as we know it.
Written by Andra Maier
Working in fashion teaches you a lot of things, but it leaves little space for creativity outside of work, because we are ‘always available’. Having a creative space is something important in my ‘switching off’ process, and writing comes easiest, especially in busy times. I love everything fashion and food related. If I am not found writing or scribbling, I am found reading the latest fiction releases, fan-girling over Harry Potter or some pretty shoes, and writing for my blog. Being able to express myself outside of work boundaries is freeing and incredible, and honing the creative spirit is one of the main resolutions I had for 2020.