Sex Ed in UK Schools Today - Do We Need to Do More?
After joining a society in my first year of Uni that taught children and young people about sexual health, consent, relationships, and the importance of maintaining sexual hygiene - I quickly realised that these were all topics that had been avoided in my secondary school ‘personal development’ lessons to some degree. Throughout this piece we’ll cover some of the most important things that were missing from my school sex ed lessons, just in case they were dropped from your curriculum too.
Sexual Health and Hygiene - The Importance of Sex Education Before University
Though the basics of sex ed are covered under the curriculum, it really does seem to depend on the teacher delivering the sessions as to what information you are given. In school, we found that a lot of teachers were either uncomfortable with teaching about STIs, STDs and contraception, or had never had in-depth sex ed lessons themselves when they were our age.
Maintaining good sexual hygiene is essential. This includes using forms of barrier contraception (condoms, dental dams, femidoms, diaphragms, caps, etc) to make sure that two genitals aren’t touching during any form of intercourse. It is a very common misconception that sexually transmitted diseases and infections can only occur if you have more than one sexual partner at a time - but this of course isn’t true and is a myth designed to shame people who have sex a lot. Regardless of whether you have been with your sexual partner, exclusively, for 6 years or 6 seconds - you can still develop an STI or STD between you if you’re not careful with your physical barrier contraceptives.
You can find out more about signs and symptoms of STIs and STDs or find a sexual health testing clinic near you by following - https://www.nhs.uk/service-search/find-a-sexual-health-clinic/
Consent and Healthy Relationships
Unfortunately, it is more than likely that between your young-teen and graduation years you will experience some heartache or an unhealthy relationship. Unhealthy relationships can come in many forms, but sexual and romantic relationships that end through arguments or even abuse can have disastrous impacts on a young person’s mental health and self-esteem.
It is important to always spot red flags in relationships; listen to your family and friends if they raise concerns about your partner, and look after your own health and well-being as a priority. Failure to recognise when intercourse is not mutually consensual is one of these flags. In a sexual context, consent should theoretically be quite simple - if either you, or your partner, are not 100% feeling like it, then stop. As young people begin to explore their sexual identities and begin to try and replicate the spontaneous sex scenes straight out of a Hollywood movie, it can seem awkward to pause and check that everyone is doing ok - but it is essential. There is nothing wrong with double checking that your partner feels safe and that their needs are met before engaging in any sexual activity, as well as stopping the flow of things if you yourself are uncomfortable or are not as into it as you were when you originally gave consent at the start.
Stigma Surrounding the Taboo
The age-old question ‘what should be included in a sex ed lesson?’ can be a tough one, as it really depends on the age group we are talking to. For example, when the menstrual cycle is discussed with Year 5 and Year 6 classes (in the UK) contraception, STIs and STDs are not mentioned - understandable when these young children are not yet sexually active. But what are those lessons missing? Well, basic levels of menstrual hygiene and genital hygiene would be a great start. It may not sound like a fun thing to discuss with a class of 10-year-olds but if they are about to start (or already have started) their periods then we need to be educating them on how to maintain menstrual and genital hygiene.
Another very common taboo is pleasure. So taboo that, though I have been teaching sex ed for 3 years now, the thought of discussing pleasure still makes me cringe - and that’s not ok! There are many different reasons why people have sex, the majority of which are conveniently left out of sex ed classes - with young people up to the ages of 15 or 16 still being taught about sex only as an integral part in the human reproductive cycle.
Fortunately for young people at the moment, influencers like Hannah Witton (YouTube) and shows such as Sex Education (Netflix) are at our fingertips - here to discuss the importance of sexual health, hygiene and consent. They also give a raw insight into the more messy mishaps that you are likely to experience in any sexual encounter, which is totally natural - even if your introduction to the birds and the bees failed to mention it.
Check out Hannah Witton’s book ‘Doing It!’ for an honest insight into topics such as sexual pleasure, body image, consent and healthy relationships!
The Importance of Discussing Sexualities in Class
Before University, I knew a lot of friends who struggled to accept their sexualities due to discussing LGBT+ relationships still being rather taboo in our small, conservative, West Wales town. I can’t help but think that if discussing different sexualities had been a part of our personal development lessons, these peers would’ve felt a lot more accepted and able to express themselves openly and without worry. Now that Scotland will be the world’s first country to include inclusive LGBT+ education before summer 2021, it is particularly clear to the rest of the UK that there are the resources available to help them step up their curriculum and inclusivity.
Being uncomfortable with your own sexuality can be extremely isolating, and lead to a lot of internal conflict and doubt. It is important to know that just because the local education system may have failed you, it doesn’t mean that other organisations will. If you have experienced any homophobic, transphobic, or biphobic abuse, organisations such as EACH (Educational Action Challenging Homophobia for Under 18s) and the LGBT Foundation can be contacted on the following helplines for advice or to provide a safe space and a listening ear -
EACH - 0808 1000 143
LGBT Foundation - 0345 330 30 30
The Future of Sex Ed. Do We Need to Do More?
After discussing each of these essential, yet missing, topics I think it's clear that there is room for improvement in our national sex ed curriculum. The UK needs to do more, and we shouldn’t have to be relying on grassroots organisations or outside-of-school charities to be delivering these sessions to our young people (especially as PD/PSE lessons are already timetabled into the school week). You can find out more about sexual health via the NHS or through organisations such as ‘Sex, Etc.’ online.
Written by Caitlin Parr
Hey, I’m Caitlin! I’m a student at Cardiff University about to embark on an MA in Journalism, Media and Communications. I work a lot in advocating for better mental health and sex ed provisions in the student community and also in media and communications for a variety of welfare, youth education and international development organisations outside of Uni.