Phones & Children: Do They Make a Good Pair?
The well-renowned writer, Stephen King, once said that salvation and damnation can be the same thing. Perhaps I’m being rather dramatic when connecting these words with the scenario of a young child tapping away on a smartphone – surely, one would think it’s not damning but once we scratch the surface and allow the ugly reality to bleed through, are parents condemning their children to a more harrowing lifestyle through the use of phones?
To begin with, I’ll raise my hands up – I’m a parent. Yes, my child – nine years old – does use a smartphone. She uses it for a limited amount of time; after homework/learning tasks have been completed and under supervision and, after which, she reads one of her favourite books or assembles her puzzles together. But, it wasn’t always like that. As a younger child, addiction to these devices flared up and I worked a tedious process of building a routine – it took grit, determination, time, patience, and tremendous doses of resilience. Did it pay off? Yes.
Not wishing to impose a defence but parenting is perhaps the toughest task in the world; it definitely was for me. Our lives take a dramatic shift from being carefree, independent adults with strong-going social lives to being parents, and every waking hour – and sleeping hour for some parents unfortunately – revolves around a creature that weighs several pounds with chubby fists that likes to whinge now and then. Unlike every part of our life that comes with education, training, advice and practice, none of these factors apply when it comes to parenting.
In short, parents feel like they’re at breaking point and need a break. When they see a device that hooks a child’s attention, some parents resort to handing these tools to their children. However, children as young as two are skilled in swiping apps and internet pages and become skilled players at ‘Subway Surf’ (my nephew is obsessed with it). Children manage to grasp the fundamental skills of a smartphone before learning to recite the alphabet. Perhaps, that aspect rings with a tone of worry.
Perhaps, there can be alternative elements to distract and retain a child’s attention without resorting to smartphones. One child – my best friend’s two-year-old – spent very little to no time with smartphones. Instead, her upbringing consisting of playing on a thick, woolly blanket spread across the floor littered with dozens of toys ranging from dolls, tea party dishes, toys that could reiterate words and even the ones that aim to assist children in walking (the ones they push around). When not playing with toys, my friend places tubs of Play-Doh in front of her child who rather enjoys squeezing and playing with the dough. Upon reflection, and having been a childcare worker in the past, playing with Play-Doh allows the child to develop their finger muscles which, in return, improves their motor skills. This assisted in my friend’s child becoming competent in writing their name at nursery level.
Using a smartphone to divert a child’s attention is not necessarily a bad thing; sometimes there are some apps that potentially assist a child in their learning. For example, there are apps that teach foreign languages which inevitably is a skill too valuable to ignore or not take advantage of. However, there can be some routines after which it may be appropriate to include or initiate other activities. Smartphones emit a blue light which does stimulate the brain rather too much and reduces their ability to sleep which can cause tiredness – physically and mentally – and this can affect them the very next day in their educational institutes where they may be less capable of retaining important information in their working memory. Needless to say, if it doesn’t last long in the working memory, it won’t complete its journey to the long-term memory.
As parents’ lives carry on endlessly, it is important to remember the concept of kindness and empathy when planning routines on using smartphones with children. Let us imagine what the long-term situation will look like and what we imagine the ideal long-time situation to be like – it is imperative to give ourselves – and the children – time, patience, determination, and grit and continue to be resilient.
Written by Aneka Chohan
Aneka works as a English teacher and as a freelance journalist based in West London. When she isn't writing or teaching, Aneka likes to pursue interests in arts, fashion, learning new languages, photography, and writing fictional stories and poetry.
