To Be Strong, To Be Soft: The Power of Introverts
Throughout the entirety of our childhoods, we are defined by something most cannot name; it defines our careers, our friendships, talents and even our goals, forging us as characters. Classically, this is introversion or extroversion.
This divide is the root core of our personalities, with each side offering different skills of equal importance. Yet how come confidence, prowess and success are so often related back to the brash and the ruthless – those who speak the loudest are nearly always the ones heard. Society perpetuates that to succeed, we must resonate with competition and battle with our voices, be able to simply conduct a room with our sharp wit and silver tongues. Only then can you become a memorable achiever. So how come, in a world where at least one-third of us are on the introverted side, have the extroverts have taken over? As social creatures, we have learnt to find shyness shameful and sensitivity a burden. What I aim to do is convert this thinking to reveal the strength of seriousness and the value of the small voice of calm.
Introverted individuals are more likely to harbour a heightened sensitivity, an acute sense to social adjustments and cues that others simply wouldn’t notice. A sense that if managed wrong, turns into social anxieties and overstimulation that perpetuates the bashfulness associated with introverted personalities. Introversion is more than shyness (fear of social judgement), it is more so how one processes external stimuli, including socially, making them often more comfortable with reduced external stimulation (e.g. spending time with one close friend rather than 5). Time spent with someone of which their social habits and emotional cues are subconsciously familiar to the introvert results in less mental analytics. This is not to say that group events cannot be enjoyed and spending time with new people not rewarding, it is just likely that the introvert requires a smaller dose than the extrovert. This sensitivity leaks into all aspects of life like a language.
When nurtured, these sensitive characters (often highly reactive when young, seen to present physical excitement at stimuli that warranted a mere smile in the future extroverts) are referred to as orkidebarn, or ‘Orchid Children’. People that if brought up in nurturing and guided environments will bloom into flowers of unusual beauty, especially if given greenhouse care. This refers to intuitive and careful behaviour harnessed by pruned sensitivity. These traits are too often associated with weakness, and the resulting quiet ineptness. This preconception needs to be smashed. We need a quiet revolution, a societal realisation that instead of asking people to always speak up, perhaps it’s time we leant forward and listened.
It is already happening, with global forerunners such as Jacinda Ardern laying claim to the power of empathy and heedfulness in leadership. New Zealand’s success in tackling the COVID-19 crisis compared to that of the USA’s is due to many reasons, however glares in the face of social science is the compliance followed by the citizens, but also by Ardern’s government body. Described as a ‘brilliant communicator and empathetic leader’, Ardern’s personal responsibility to protection of her people is the primary theme projected throughout every address and decision made, at the epicentre of every choice. New Zealand residents described her leadership to the BBC as "Every decision is made with the disclaimer that she knows how difficult it's going to be for people," as well as perpetuating the importance of kindness at this difficult time. This is not about her political prowess, there is no boasting, tormenting or tearing down of others decisions. Voices of the scientific community are exhumed and those whose voices should be heard aren’t only listened to, but are at the forefront of every critical verdict. This solicitous leadership has resulted in compliance by citizens, and when compared to the USA, it is astounding. Riots claiming ‘sacrifice the weak’ and ‘this is communism’ litter Washington, the antonym to the attitudes of Kiwis. Ardern is trustworthy and caring, like that teacher at school you didn’t fear but respected. She demonstrates the aforementioned traits within her leadership, epitomised by the 20% pay cut she will be taking as a symbol of solidarity.
This reflection of the quiet is applicable to all – there is no polar line where introversion and extroversion splits, we are all capable of aspects of both, a kind of personality plasticity. The thoughtful and careful aspects of the sensitive decision-maker can benefit all, and I hope we learn to glorify both, and not only listen to the loud, but look for the listener; their thoughts may hold more than meets the eye.
Written by Danni Pollock
Danni is a 20 year old student, studying for a Msci in Biology at the University of Bristol but currently living in Bournemouth (thanks COVID), where she is a photographer. She has always found her peace in writing and art, but her purpose in the planet’s biota.