'Not my body' by Victorianna Balaktsoglou
I, like many women, found it very hard to come to terms with my new, postpartum body. This physical change came at a time where I was also struggling mentally as I tried to adjust to parenthood.
When I shared my previous piece for The Everyday, From Me to Mum: Does Motherhood Mean Losing Your Identity?, so many women - both new mums and seasoned parents - reached out to me to say how much it resonated with them. Whilst it’s sad that this is seemingly a universal experience, the fact that my writing managed to encapsulate what so many of us go through was a wonderful feeling. This poem aims to do the same thing.
If you also struggled with your body image postpartum, this poem is for you.
Your body literally created a human being. You grew your child’s arms, their legs, their bellybutton. That face you love so much? You made it!
Our bodies are amazing - scars and all.
Not my body
I look in the mirror,
at the space that you left
when you entered this world,
from my torso cleft.
Not my body, I think,
as I struggle to see,
the beauty that lies
within what’s left of me.
Not my body, I think,
as I look at the scars,
both inside and out,
that helped you become ours.
But my stomach, now empty,
once served as your home,
the skin that was stretched
gave you space to roam.
Now lines trail my thighs,
testament to the time
we both lived together
in this body of mine.
That’s my body, I say,
that’s a real work of art,
for the void that was left,
you now fill in my heart.
Written by Victorianna Balaktsoglou
Victorianna Balaktsoglou is a marketing and communications professional based in Milton Keynes but hailing from much sunnier Athens, Greece. A keen linguist and craft enthusiast, she is passionate about body positivity, gender equality, football, and good food.
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