The Wonder of Small Things
I have a wonderful acupuncturist near Wells, who I have been seeing regularly for the last 5 years or so. Whenever my life is wonky and the world looks all wrong and I don’t know where my place in it is, she knocks off all of the hard edges and smooths everything out. One of the most memorable things that she has ever said to me, is “Do more of what gives you joy”. And do you know what, it’s that simple. Do more of what gives you joy.
What gives you joy doesn’t need to be something huge. It doesn’t need to be a full on holiday in the Seychelles, it doesn’t need to be living in a castle – it can be the tiny things that lift your heart, make you smile and give you peace inside.
Years ago, I read an article in a magazine, I think it was Red magazine, where they talked about doing a mood board for your life. If you are feeling a bit discontented or blue, life isn’t quite where you want it to be but you don’t really know what is missing, do yourself a mood board and put on there all of the things that you, realistically, can have in your life that will make you feel happier. I had a particularly rough Christmas and New Year this year and I remembered this article and thought, ok, I’ll give it a go and I also thought hard about what Shelley, my acupuncturist, had said about doing what gives you joy and seeing whether I truly could do more of it. I started with thinking about the things that happen in my everyday life [see what I did there?] that do make me really happy. So, I started a Pinterest board for the things in my life that bring me happiness and when I forget who I am or what to do, I go back to the board to remind myself that all these things are easily in reach.
Being out in the countryside makes me really happy. Whether it is spending a whole day out walking with my dog, Daphne, or driving up the M5 just looking at fields alongside, there is always a wonderful view, deer or rabbits, maybe just a beautiful tree. Looking at nature doing its thing and changing every season also gives me joy. Seeing bulbs pushing through the soil, ferns unfurling, blossom coming out in the hedgerows, it’s like a kind of magic and it never fails to amaze me. In the autumn, with the changing golden light, the air starting to become crisp in the mornings, the trees turning bronze and copper and gold, to me it’s just the most perfect thing you could ever experience. Being outside and just taking the time to look around and see what is right there next to you, if you’d only just look, is my peace and my joy and I’m grateful for it every single day.
For you, it might be something completely different. It might be the perfect boiled egg with the perfect consistent width soldiers. It could be shopping with your girlfriends or being in bed on Sunday morning with the papers, the children and the cat all piled in with you. Maybe its having your week all planned out in your diary so that you know exactly what time you have, or baking your favourite indulgent chocolate cake and getting to lick the bowl yourself. It could be anything. Anything that gives you joy.
There’s a quote from Jeremy Bentham – “Stretching his hand up to reach the stars, too often man forgets the flowers at his feet”. I think that this is true of many of us. We are so busy looking at other people’s Insta ready lives and all the shiny big things that we forget the little things that are far more achievable that can make the most enormous difference. So look for the small things. When something makes you happy, take the time to recognise it and just sit with it for a moment to understand it. When times are tough and you’re feeling all at sea, think about those things and find a way to bring them into your life more; find a way to do more of the things that bring you joy.
[I send this article with love to Shelley, who has helped me be joyous and with thanks to The Everyday for giving me a place to try and put into words some of the things that really matter to me – thank you!]
Written by Sarah-Jane
Sarah-Jane lives in Bridgwater, Somerset with her dog, Daphne and her partner, Simon. She loves walking and nature and volunteers for WWT at Steart Marshes. She also loves crafting and wishes she was actually Kirstie Allsopp (and had her frock collection).
