58 Years of Hurt...Women Have Dealt With More Than That
Almost 30 years ago, I was growing up to a soundtrack of the Spice Girls, whose pop feminist themes of friendship and ‘girl power’ danced their way into my pre-teen years like a new best friend. In a time when inflatable accessories were the norm, I remember feeling as if anything was possible. This was a whole new era for women and the beginning of something really special...or so I thought.
Fast forward to 2024, and the promise of those years feels distant. Despite all the progress, I can’t help but feel that the ‘zig-a-zig-ah’ of empowerment is still missing.
Whilst we have taken some big steps forward since those girl power days, the reality of 2024 leaves me frustrated. The achievements of past feminist movements are undeniable—I can vote, work, and file for divorce—but these rights don't mask the persistent underlying inequalities that continue to plague our society. Men continue to threaten women’s safety, as exposed in the #metoo movement, whilst women are forced to work harder than men for the same positions, respect and pay.
Take football, for instance. In the 2022 Euros, football finally ‘came home’ when England beat Germany two goals to one, bringing the trophy home in a moment that should have been celebrated as a national triumph. Yet, the festivities were muted compared to what would have erupted had it been the men’s team lifting the cup. Women, who have had to fight to even have a place on the field, often find their achievements minimised and their successes overlooked. It makes me wonder: if women’s victories are downplayed, how are we ever to feel truly seen and heard, let alone powerful and liberated?
Following the hype of this year‘s Euros, I’ve been thinking and talking about football a lot. My obsession with watching the games led me to dive deeper into the commentary around the tournament. I began to see how it acts as a mirror reflecting our culture, exposing the deep impact of the patriarchy - and not just on women but on men too.
There has been much criticism of the men’s England football team, with plenty of blame for failures being directed at Gareth Southgate, as well as other key players. This need to make one person responsible misses the greater accomplishments and journey our team and manager have been on together. The dialogue around Southgate and his management style has angered me. I have been impressed with what appears to be a more gentle and nurturing style of leadership - with players engaging in pre-match yoga and sharing how he has supported them emotionally outside of the game. However, pundits and fans repeatedly ridiculed him, despite getting our team to the final. A manager who has the well-being of his team ahead of anything else (and still gets his team to the last game) feels like Common Sense 1 - Toxic Masculinity 0. But perhaps we just aren’t ready to see that.
Despite these reflections, girls have been doing things differently…
Women’s football is a movement that seems all the more impressive when you delve a little deeper into its history. Until recently, I had presumed that girl’s football was a relatively new phenomenon, due to the rise of our Lionesses and their impressive accomplishments. What I didn’t realise was that this was a battle women had fought once already. Back in the early 1900’s, football was hugely popular among ladies. By 1921, there were around 150 women’s football clubs, and some women’s matches were pulling in crowds of over 50,000. Shockingly (or not, when you consider the history of feminism), later that year, with women’s football at an all-time high, the FA effectively banned women from playing. They claimed that football was “quite unsuitable for females” and suggested it could damage their health. This ban was only lifted in 1971.
English men have been sulking about' 58 years of hurt’, whilst in the same period: women have fought for the right to play again, created the FA Women's Cup, pushed to develop a professional League, and won a major European tournament—and you didn't hear them make a fuss about it.
With this in mind, what our Lionesses have achieved is all the more impressive. They represent women as a whole: tenacious, hard-working, and determined, and they prove what is possible, even against the odds, all whilst earning way less than their male counterparts.
How have we come this far? Women build deep friendships and communities and, because women have always been pushed down, continue to find ways to keep coming back - together. But what about men? Whilst football brought women together, it seems to - sometimes - do the opposite with men. The police presence at games will tell you all you need to know about the tension, and violence, that still rumbles underneath the atmosphere of many a game.
Sadly, many men feel feminism is an attack on them rather than a movement which benefits everyone. Laura Bates, in her book Everyday Sexism, wisely states, 'This is not a men vs. women issue. It’s about people vs. prejudice.' If men can acknowledge the struggles women have faced—and continue to face—they might also find the strength to be kinder to themselves and to each other. And what might that do? It could level everything up, for everyone.
Considering intersectionality is important too, if we are able to understand where multiple layers of inequality or disadvantage make life so much harder for some, whilst also acknowledging the privileges we do have, we will be closer to making the world better for everyone. After all, as Fannie Lou Hamer once said, 'Nobody’s free until everybody’s free.'
So, I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want: a new wave of feminism, one supported—and better yet, driven—by men. A world where women’s achievements are spotlighted, where feminine qualities are celebrated as strengths rather than dismissed as weaknesses. Because together, we rise, or as the Spice Girls might say, 'Make it last forever. Friendship never ends’.
Written by Nicola Scott
Bristol native creative and late diagnosed ADHDer. I'm passionate about wellbeing, slower living and a more inclusive world. Find me here: www.nancyandbelle.com
.