The Heart of Christmas: Finding Meaning Beyond the Material
Every year as December approaches, I’m struck by the magic of the season - the streets lighting up, festive music filling the air, and the sense of anticipation building around the holidays. But alongside the charm, I can’t shake a sense of discomfort with what Christmas has become for so many of us: a whirlwind of consumerism, waste, and, often, unmet expectations. I find myself wondering how we got here - how a holiday meant to bring joy and connection has morphed into something that can feel so forced, stressful, and detached from its original purpose.
And while Christmas is a traditionally Christian holiday commemorating the birth of Jesus Christ, its modern celebration reaches far beyond religious communities. In fact, for many people, the original religious significance of Christmas might feel almost irrelevant compared to the holiday’s current cultural norms. But in a world increasingly conscious of issues like sustainability, waste, and even the dangers of overindulgence, why does Christmas continue to captivate so many of us?
Christmas as a Cultural Tradition Beyond Religion
For many, Christmas has evolved far beyond its Christian origins to become a cultural tradition. In fact, it has become so ingrained in some cultures that opting out of it can feel like rejecting a universal social ritual. Much like Valentine’s Day or Halloween, it’s less about its original religious meaning and more about shared rituals—gathering with loved ones, exchanging gifts, and creating a festive atmosphere. For those who don’t subscribe to Christianity, it’s often a celebration of togetherness and reflection, a chance to mark the end of the year surrounded by family and friends. In this sense, Christmas has almost become a “second New Year’s,” a social milestone that holds universal appeal.
This shift to cultural celebration is fueled by media, retail, and popular stories that shape the holiday season into something almost universally celebrated, whether or not one observes the religious aspect of it.
The Power of Nostalgia
Christmas is deeply tied to nostalgia for many. Childhood memories of opening presents, sharing comfort food with family, and the magical escape from life’s worries are powerful. Even as adults, we hold onto traditions that remind us of simpler times. I still cherish the warm glow of a lit tree or the joy of playing Christmas music while preparing a cosy meal. These moments ground us in a world that often feels overwhelming.
This nostalgia keeps many of us devoted to Christmas, despite its growing commercialisation. Advertisers tap into these feelings, encouraging us to recreate childhood “magic” through new decorations, gifts, and indulgences. For many, skipping Christmas feels like turning away from cherished memories and traditions.
The Guilt and Social Pressure of Gift-Giving
Of course, gift-giving at Christmas is one of the biggest, and often most controversial, aspects of the holiday. For me, this is where the holiday feels most complicated, and I often wonder why we put ourselves through this. Many people, like myself, relish the idea of giving gifts for birthdays - occasions that celebrate individuals directly. But Christmas gifts can feel different. Sometimes, they’re less personal, more obligatory, and the pressure to buy for so many people - family, friends, even colleagues - can feel overwhelming and, frankly, exhausting.
This phenomenon has grown alongside a commercialisation that tells us Christmas without presents is somehow incomplete, almost taboo. In fact, Christmas spending in the UK is set to outpace many European countries in 2024, reflecting strong consumer sentiment. British shoppers are projected to spend £11.35 billion on gifts, the largest category of festive expenditure, and £8.07 billion on food and drink, emphasising the importance of traditional holiday feasts. Yet for many, this enormous outlay highlights the tension between the joy of giving and the stress of meeting such high expectations.
And let’s talk about the pressure to buy presents for everyone. Many of us spend hours - sometimes days - searching for the perfect gift for each person, only to feel deflated when the exchange happens. The gifts we receive often end up being things we don’t need, won’t use, and ultimately have to regift, donate, or toss. It all feels wasteful and impersonal, leaving me to wonder why we continue to participate in this cycle year after year.
Moreover, the holiday often brings with it a subtle form of peer pressure. Society has framed gift-giving as a central Christmas tradition, creating a cultural expectation that a “good Christmas” includes an abundance of gifts. For some, this expectation translates to financial strain, even debt, as people strive to meet these norms. Advertising intensifies this pressure by convincing people that material gifts represent love and appreciation. And so, despite a growing awareness of the waste and debt that can accompany it, the cycle of gift-giving persists.
The Hidden Costs of Christmas Consumerism
Christmas is arguably the epitome of consumer holidays. We’re inundated with messages urging us to spend, spend, spend and the holiday has become synonymous with shopping. The commercialisation of Christmas is no accident but rather the result of carefully crafted advertising campaigns that have steadily ramped up since the early 20th century. From “Black Friday” to “Cyber Monday,” retailers have honed the art of Christmas marketing to maximise sales during this season, which is the most profitable time of year for many businesses. Even iconic images like Santa Claus in his red suit owe their popularity to advertising—Coca-Cola’s 1930s campaigns cemented the cheerful figure we all recognise today.
But all this consumerism comes at a cost, and it’s not just financial. Research shows that material gifts don’t create lasting happiness—experiences do. Yet year after year, we pile on the purchases, often out of obligation rather than genuine joy. And the environmental impact is staggering. The mountains of wrapping paper, packaging, and discarded goods contribute to a significant waste problem. Even as more people embrace eco-friendly practices, like homemade gifts or sustainable packaging, these efforts are dwarfed by the sheer scale of holiday waste. The irony is hard to ignore: a holiday meant to celebrate goodwill and kindness has become a major contributor to environmental harm.
The environmental impact of Christmas in the UK is significant, with a notable amount of waste generated across various sectors. Every year, approximately 338,251 tonnes of cardboard packaging are discarded, along with 35,877 tonnes of plastic waste. In terms of food, a staggering 4.2 million Christmas dinners are wasted, which includes millions of pounds worth of food like turkeys, mince pies, and vegetables. Additionally, a large portion of the waste comes from Christmas trees, with 6 million trees discarded annually, contributing to a considerable carbon footprint. Wrapping paper also adds to the pile, with 227,000 miles of it being thrown away each year.
Together, these wastes amount to a massive environmental burden, contributing to a rise in carbon emissions. The UK's Christmas waste collectively results in approximately 1.4 million tonnes of CO2 emissions. These shocking statistics highlight the need for more sustainable practices, especially during a time when excess consumption is prevalent.
Overindulgence: When Celebration Becomes Excess
One often overlooked aspect of Christmas that weighs heavily on me is the culture of overindulgence it encourages. The holiday season is synonymous with rich foods, sweets, and alcohol, and we’re often told that going all out is part of the “festive spirit.” While some find joy in these indulgences, for others- myself included - it can feel like another obligation, an expectation to eat, drink, and celebrate in ways that don’t always align with our values or well-being.
As someone who is chronically ill and in recovery from an eating disorder, this pressure is especially challenging. There’s a feeling of being left out of the “Christmas magic” if I choose to pass on the mince pies, the roast dinners, or the festive alcohol. It’s as though saying no to these traditions makes me somehow less festive, or that I’m missing out on something essential to the holiday spirit. The temptation to give in is real, especially when everyone around me is indulging, and it’s hard not to feel like I’m being “too difficult” or that I’m depriving myself of the joy others seem to get from these foods. But the reality is that indulging in these foods doesn’t always bring the joy I’m told it should. For me, it often leads to guilt, discomfort, and the worsening of my health.
This pressure to overindulge is not just about food, though. It’s about the whole holiday culture of excess - the constant expectation to eat more, drink more, do more. While I understand the enjoyment others find in this, for me it’s a reminder of how disconnected the holiday has become from its true meaning. After the holiday cheer fades, many people may find themselves facing not just health impacts but also a financial one, especially with the elevated costs of holiday foods and drinks.
Despite all the critiques of modern Christmas, there are still aspects that resonate deeply with many people. The decorations, the sense of community, the time to pause and spend with loved ones - these are the traditions that often make Christmas meaningful. The tree, the lights, the music, and even seasonal activities like carolling or watching Christmas movies bring a sense of warmth and joy. These elements don’t need to come with a price tag, and for many, they represent a version of Christmas that feels more genuine.
In a sense, the core of Christmas - the togetherness, the goodwill, and the simple pleasure of creating a warm, welcoming space - can still be reclaimed, even as we navigate the more problematic aspects of the holiday.
Reclaiming the Heart of Christmas
Is it time to redefine Christmas? For me, the heart of the holiday isn’t in the gifts or extravagant meals - it’s in the genuine moments of connection. The twinkle of lights on a frosty evening, sharing stories with loved ones, or reflecting on the year gone by - these are the traditions that truly matter. They don’t require excessive spending or waste and feel far more authentic than anything you can buy in a store.
As more people become aware of the downsides of a commercialised Christmas, I’ve noticed a growing movement toward simpler, more meaningful celebrations. Some are choosing experiences over material gifts or embracing sustainable practices. Others are letting go of the holiday altogether, creating new traditions that resonate more deeply. For me, this shift feels like a breath of fresh air - a chance to reclaim Christmas for what it should be.
In the end, the question isn’t why we celebrate Christmas but how we celebrate it in a way that feels authentic. If the holiday is causing debt, stress, or guilt, maybe it’s time to change our approach. By focusing on what truly brings joy - time with loved ones, meaningful experiences, and kindness - we can create a holiday that feels both responsible and fulfilling.
For the past four years, my husband and I have been rethinking what Christmas means to us. The biggest change? We stopped buying gifts for everyone, including each other. Instead, we focus on spending quality time with loved ones, and the relief it has brought is immeasurable. At first, some people didn’t understand. They thought we were being impersonal or uncaring. But for us, it wasn’t just about saving money - it was about preserving our mental well-being. The stress of finding “perfect” gifts and the financial strain of buying for everyone had turned Christmas into a cycle of exhaustion, leaving us drained rather than joyful.
Breaking free from the pressure of gift-giving has allowed us to focus on what truly matters: shared moments and cherished memories. Instead of presents, we prioritise experiences - cooking a special meal, taking a trip, or simply spending time together intentionally.
Now, Christmas is no longer about ticking off lists or meeting expectations. It’s about slowing down, reflecting, and enjoying peace. While others may not always understand, I’ve come to realise that Christmas isn’t about what you give or receive - it’s about the people you share it with. By letting go of the pressure to do more, spend more, and give more, we’ve found a way to celebrate that feels sustainable and joyful.
This year, I’m embracing sustainability and simplicity. I’m letting go of the guilt that often comes with not meeting societal expectations and focusing on thoughtful gestures and connection. Christmas, at its core, is not about the stuff - it’s about love, memories, and togetherness. For me, it’s not about whether we celebrate Christmas but how we choose to make it meaningful. And that means prioritising time, presence, and the peace that comes with stepping away from unnecessary pressure.
Written by Amelia Karginaite
Amelia Karginaite (she/her) is a freelance journalist and activist whose storytelling explores the intersection of culture, fashion, and social issues, with a deep passion for advocating equality in all its forms. While she is particularly focused on gender equality, her work also champions LGBTQ+ rights and social justice for marginalised communities. A former UN Women UK delegate at CSW68, Amelia supports survivors of gender-based violence through her volunteer efforts with Jabalie UK and empowers individuals in their professional journeys through her work at Smartworks charity. As a queer and chronically ill writer, she brings a unique perspective to her work, championing inclusivity, resilience, and social change.