Self-Aware or Self-Conscious: Are Performative Male Contests Evidence of Gen-Z Insecurity?
Dressed in wide-leg trousers, holding an oat flat white between painted fingernails, and reading a copy of The Bell Jar, it is: The Performative Male. You might have heard of this new label for men and seen various caricatures of it in competition with one another at a performative male contest in-person or on TikTok. The contests themselves have gained virality more than the male himself, but who exactly is the Performative Male?
He is a man who has spent enough time around (usually left-leaning) women to understand how best to dress himself in green flags and appear to be the most feminist man to ever exist. The performative male reads feminist literature (in public), claims that Greta Gerwig is his favourite director (loudly at a party), and lets you know that he always has a tampon with him because he understands.
On the surface, this doesn’t seem like such a bad thing. But, the issue is the intention - is this a man truly playing with his sense of style and attempting to understand a popular 20th century author or is he instead being excruciatingly self-aware and simply putting on the costume of a man he thinks would attract a woman? The issue with the latter is that these characteristics generally begin to disappear after a few dates, revealing a man who hasn’t read more than the blurb of bell hooks’s All About Love. It is an aesthetic trap. J'Nae Phillips, a trend forecaster and creator of the Fashion Tingz newsletter, described him best in a quote to The Guardian: "A performative male is less about who someone is than about how they curate and project masculinity in public - usually online. He is someone acutely aware that manhood is being watched, assessed, and consumed, and so he stages it."
This is a particular type of manhood that is being assessed - and critiqued - and is in direct contrast to the environment curated in the manosphere. The performative male is attempting to show that he is not like other men, indeed he understands how toxic masculinity is displayed and is explicitly attempting to show that he isn't part of this toxicity. The problem is that he is actually contributing to it. The performative male is someone who might appear to be safe on the surface but is instead just as likely to hurt you as a man who is openly dismissive towards women’s interests - except with the former, he has already ensnared you in a month-long situationship. Whilst the performative male contests are fun and funny, there is something much more sinister about how many people have experienced dating a man whose entire personality is a mask, if not a trap.
These contests are within the same vein as tiktoks of men who show themselves reading books, such as Lolita, whilst shaking their heads so that whomever sees them knows they are not enjoying it and do not agree with the content. Social media has made all of us feel as though we are under constant surveillance and so feel it is necessary to display our personalities and politics at all times. This, coupled with real threats by men to women's safety, has created an environment in which any 'good' man needs to show he is 'safe'. Yet, some men are taking advantage of this and curating an image of manhood that appears safe to women but is in fact a front. As feminism evolves and men become more aware of the threat other men pose to women, some men are using their physical appearance as a way of indicating their level of 'safety' to women. Others, such as the performative male, are using it as an opportunity to lure women in and potentially make them unsafe yet again.
So, what about the spate of performative male contests that have begun popping up across Europe and the US? During these contests, men dial up the performance and attempt to be the ultimate caricature of the performative male. This includes pockets overflowing with tampons, wearing a t-shirt reading ‘This is what a feminist looks like’, and carrying a tote bag containing a Lana Del Rey album (on vinyl, of course). The contests are an open mockery of a type of man who may prove to be dangerous to women and this in itself is not such a bad thing. It is a way of calling out and displaying the characteristics of a performative male.
But, in another way, are these contests a way for men to mock themselves before anyone else has the chance to? In a recent interview with ABC News, author, poet, and professor Ocean Vuong stated that he has noticed a significant increase in how self-conscious and insecure his students are becoming. Vuong noticed that his students were “self-conscious of trying” due to the “surveillance culture” of social media. Whilst his students had ambitions of becoming poets and writers, they were held back by a fear of appearing “cringe”. Instead of expressing the sincerity that they feel, they perform cynicism as a way of getting ahead of any judgement or criticism. When the world you have grown up in is constantly surveilled, recorded, and shared, the spaces in which you can be free and expressive are shrunk. Whilst Vuong’s comments were about working and attempting to achieve a dream, the levels of insecurity and self-consciousness felt by Gen Z can also be seen in these contests. Whilst the men in these contests are purposely presenting an over-the-top version of the performative male, are we to believe that they all went out and bought each of the items they brought with them? It is likely that they already owned that Lana Del Ray album but can now take it to a contest in a ‘Smash the patriarchy’ tote bag and openly mock themselves before anyone else has the chance.
What effect will something like a performative male contest have on men? A friend who has rediscovered a love of reading in recent years enjoys nothing more than reading a novel in a cafe. He reads widely and does not discriminate by gender when choosing an author (this is not the case for all men as they are significantly less likely to read a book by a woman, whereas women have a more even gender split). He recently told me that he is now feeling too self-conscious and worried about reading in a cafe for fear that he will be perceived as a performative male and therefore make the women around him feel uncomfortable. Especially in the current political climate, we do not want to risk discouraging men from reading feminist literature. But, perhaps one or two people questioning the intentions and sincerity of a man reading a book in a cafe is worth ensuring the safety of women.
The real villain in all this is the true performative male who subscribes to a toxic masculinity which he masks beneath a progressive costume. He has, almost impressively, spoiled the dating scene and made it even harder to find a date that will actually treat you as a person. These contests would not be in existence if these men were truly progressive and safe for women to be around. But now, because women have become aware of the performative male, another version is evolving - one who mocks himself at a performative male contest. Eager to appear on TikTok and prove that he can laugh at himself and is cynical of other men, he parades in front of crowds of women to show he understands that the other men are only pretending to be progressive. But don’t worry - he’s not like other guys.
Written by Georgia Winstone
